which david lynch character are you?

I admit that I often read the quiz results that appear on the fbook feed. What annoys me is that no matter what the answer is, it is always ultimately positive. For example, the model seems to be something along the lines of: “What Bill Murray character are you?” Let’s say you’re Bob, from What About Bob? “Perhaps you have some problems and you’ve been in therapy all you’re life, but at heart you know what counts and people respect that…essentially, you’re endearing and people love you…etc. etc.”

I want to see a quiz like, “Which David Lynch character are you?” Frank Booth—“you have lots of very serious issues and you probably should be in prison or a mental hospital. You fashion yourself to be a cool guy, but what that really entails is pushing other people around in an insecure way and using strange drugs and then performing weird sex acts. You’re fucked up.”

My point is, do people really take these quizs so seriously that they’d be offended if the result wasn’t overwhelmingly positive? I have some ideas for quizes: What kind of annoying person at a party are you? How much do you abuse alcohol? Which character are you in Caddyshack? Which Keanu Reeves character are you? Etc. etc.